Stump of a Muffin

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings.  The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs.

When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor.  Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you $800 to drop that towel.”  After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob, after a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and leaves.

The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs.  When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, “Who was that?”

“It was Bob the next door neighbor,” she replies.

“Great,” the husband says, “did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?”

Moral of the story:
If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.

I believe in sharing the road with other drivers. They can have the part behind me.

If you photoshop out the wine glasses you’re left with a pic of rich white people flashing gang signs.

Getting a little sick of these email alerts from my bank implying I’m unbalanced.

Is it too much to hope that my good cholesterol will be a positive influence on my bad cholesterol?

I wish my wife would let me show her who’s boss around here.

It occurs to me that they’re not too many banks left with the word “trust” in their name, are there?

When you set big, powerful, life-changing goals, it’s as if the Universe gets behind you… and gives you a wedgie.

I cut my drinking in half by eliminating the orange juice in these screwdrivers.

You know you’re getting old when the bank sends your free calendar one month at a time.